15 November 2023

To Share Or Not To Share? Protecting Your Child’s Image Online

Social media has changed the face of our relationships and the way we connect with others. As our online habits and practices change, so does the language used to describe them. In June 2022, the term “sharenting” was added to the Oxford English Dictionary, proving its widespread popularity. The Collins online dictionary defines “sharenting” as the “habitual use of social media to share news, images, etc. of one’s children.”

According to a 2018 study by UK internet domain manager Nominet, the average parent shares around 1500 photos of their child before they turn five. Around 84% of Australian children have photos shared of them before they’re two.

Parents share content about their children for many reasons. They use social media to celebrate milestones, store treasured memories, and exchange advice on parenting with others. However, this casual act can have greater positive or negative ramifications than the person posting imagines.

“Sharenting”: The Risks and the Issue of Consent

To begin with, consent can be a touchy issue. According to the 2018 Nominet study (of 2,001 parents) 51% never seek their kids’ consent before posting about them, or don’t feel it’s necessary. However, many children feel uncomfortable or embarrassed by parents posting images or videos of them online, even if parents think it’s “cute” or “harmless.”

Once content is out there, the original poster (OP) and the person it relates to don’t have complete control over it. Teenagers are often extremely conscious of how their peers and friends see them, and unlike many older folk, have more of an idea of how images can be manipulated, misused, or even go viral.

A 2022 Journal of Psychology study indicated that teens who constantly used Instagram were more likely to compare themselves in unhealthy ways to peers. With sharenting, kids may feel pressured to perform and ultimately measure their self-worth against social media metrics. This can lead to feeling inadequate or jealous of others.

The Nominet survey indicates that many parents don’t know how privacy settings on platforms like Facebook work or review them regularly. Ironically, young people often know more about this and take care what they post online.

Disagreements about consent can create rifts in relationships and be seen as a violation of privacy. Think about what you’re sharing, who you’re sharing with and the implications of doing so. Will your kid like their future boss stumbling on that potty training video you made for laughs? How about their temper tantrums being turned into a meme? How will what you post make them feel now and in the future?

Although cases of children suing parents are rare, the stage is set for it to occur. Laws are being updated to protect individual privacy. For example, in France, sharing photos of people without their consent can result in a €45,000 fine and a year in prison.

Safety Concerns: Sharing platforms are vulnerable to data leaks. Even if leaks don’t occur, these platforms sell our information to third parties like advertisers. Big companies use it to target ads to platform users – making you the product up for grabs on social media. Hackers can steal personal info for malevolent purposes, including identity theft. Geotagged photos reveal sensitive information such as your address or how secure your home is. Paedophile sites on the dark web circulate photos of children downloaded from social media and blogs.

Making Sharing Safer: Strategies for Children and Caregivers

To ensure a safe and happy online experience for everyone:

• Avoid including names, dates of birth, addresses, ages, names of schools, pets or pics of your home in posts. Create profiles using aliases instead. Don’t make it easy for predators to find you.

• Only allow people you know well to connect with you on social media. Get to know new acquaintances before adding them. Familiarise yourself with privacy settings and check them regularly, ensuring all posts are set to “private” or “friends only”, rather than “friends of friends” or “public.”

• When sharing photos, blur faces or hide them with emojis. This allows children to maintain control of their identity and protects them from being recognised by strangers or facial recognition software.

• Clarify your policies about sharing photos and other information on social media with friends and family. Seek consent before posting and respect others if they don’t want to connect or appear in photos. If content causes offence, take it down, particularly if someone asks you to.

• Create a checklist and consult it before posting. Include questions like “Is this content embarrassing/unflattering? Who can see it? What’s the purpose of posting? Have I asked people pictured for consent?” Where possible, send posts to relevant parties for approval. Ensure your wishes are respected regarding your privacy and that of your family.

• Remove location info and geotagging from photos and don’t tag others.

• Use family apps like Tiny Beans which share content with a limited number of people chosen by you or send photos by email.

• Letting children have their own social media account before 13 isn’t a great idea. Checkboxes to make sure users are over a certain age aren’t for decoration.

• Check in with children regarding online activity. What do they do online and who are their friends? Discuss the impact of cyber bullying and be supportive if they are victims of it. Think about how they can support friends going through it.

• When sharing sensitive information on public websites, do so anonymously and avoid going into detail.

• Create alerts to notify you when your name or your child’s name appears on the Internet. Search the dark web and Google yourself to see what’s out there about you.

Role modelling responsible social media use is essential. Discussing privacy settings, consent, and the dangers of indiscriminate posting is part of this. Building awareness creates empathic people who prioritise their safety and that of others over likes. It helps develop strong friendships and avoids causing harm. Remember to share with care!

Bibliography

Commissioner for Children and Young People. “Fact Sheet: Manage Your Sharenting.” March 2020.    

Deutsche Telekom. “Sharenting (Germany, 2023, Subtitled).” YouTube video. 13 July 2023.

Nominet. “More than 2.7m parents share family photos with complete strangers online.” 6 February 2018.

Nominet. “Share With Care.” Infographic. 6 February 2018.

The Atlantic. “Are Parents Exploiting Their Kids on Social Media? ” YouTube video. 22 May 2019.

Bandara, Pesala. “Terrifying Ad Warns Parents Against Sharing Photos of Their Kids Online.” PetaPixel. 13 July 2023.

Bessant, Claire. “Should I post photos of my children online? Here’s what a new parents need to know about sharenting.” The Conversation (Australian edition). 21 October 2022.

Britt, Kaeli. “How are deepfakes dangerous? ” Nevada Today. 31 March 2023.

Gray, Jeremy. “Mark Zuckerberg Hides His Kids’ Faces Online, Should You? ” PetaPixel. 10 July 2023.

Hopegood, Rosie. “The perils of ‘sharenting’ : The parents who share too much.” Al Jazeera. 11 October 2020.

Lorenz, Taylor. “When Kids Realise Their Whole Life Is Already Online.” The Atlantic. 20 February 2019.

Mancall-Bitel, Nicholas. “The apps combating ‘sharenting.’ The BBC. 14 August 2019.

Matthews, Cale. “Sharenting.” Video transcript. Australian Broadcasting Corporation. BTN. Updated 29 March 2023.

Molloy, Fran with Wayne Warburton and Joanne Faulkner. “‘Sharenting’alert: the risks of sharing pics of your kids online.” The Lighthouse. Macquarie University. 1 June 2019.

Sanghani, Radhika. ”The great ‘sharenting’ debate, are parents posting too much? ” The Sydney Morning Herald. 31 October 2019.

Travers, Mark. “2 Major Risks Linked With ‘Sharenting Your Kids’ Lives On Social Media.” Forbes Magazine. 17 June 2023.

Zhang, Michael. “French Police Warn Parents to Stop Sharing Facebook Photos of Their Kids.” PetaPixel.